tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27522126668116425722024-03-07T11:10:30.789-08:00you, me & nobody you knowThis blog originated so that friends could monitor me while I was traveling alone as well as sponsor my beer tour. It evolved into randomness that later died. I have revived it as an ode to bad internet dating. I will post mainly messages, but will accept stories and unidentifiable pictures.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger381125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-19077391096361852572016-08-24T05:32:00.000-07:002016-08-24T05:32:02.544-07:00The End of and EraI gave up internet dating cold turkey 4 weeks ago. What happened? I realized I was happier not doing it. I am not an unhappy person in general, but I noticed that it is actually an unhealthy addiction. It gives you a rush, potentially a high, and generally a crash, but a fix is always around the corner.<div>
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I told myself, if I felt like going back to internet dating, I could go back after the first snow, but not until then. That was until Monday when I realized I had paid for 6 months on a site that I had not been using. After paying about $130 and having 20 days left, I figured there was no harm going back in the event that I could maybe get a date or two out of it and since I already paid for it. I hate wasting money.</div>
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Within 24 hours I had 26 messages including one from my building maintenance man asking me out in an insistent tone. He wrote "I didn't think someone as pretty as you, would ever be single." He went on about how gorgeous he thought I was and spewed his phone number and to let him know I received his message. </div>
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I never really felt comfortable around him. He called me "Sunshine." Anyone who knows me would know that I find a man who is not remotely in a position to use a term of endearment using one, extremely irritating. It implies some sort of breach of boundary and or is condescending. I am not sunshine or anyone's sunshine. Use my name, it is who I am, and I have earned every letter and syllable in it. I am the only one to be called it, so do so.</div>
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I also did not like the way he always complimented my appearance. I was told that I looked nice all the time. I know when I look nice and I like to be feminine. I have no children, no pets, but I have a closet full of dresses. I like them, I like the way they make me feel, but I don't need someone in professional relationship to tell me that they like the way I look as if I am doing for them and not for myself.</div>
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I didn't like the way it seamed he would go out of his way to hold the elevator so he could ride with me. In instances that I intercepted him in the lobby or garage, no matter what I would do to delay myself, he waited, what often felt like unnatural amount of time. </div>
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If I was working out in the gym, I felt like there he had to make eye and verbal contact with me though I may have my head phones in and I was on the treadmill running or laying on the floor stretching. </div>
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It unnerved me. It felt different then the way the older maintenance man treated me. He chatted and was sweet in that he watched out for me and my home like an older uncle would. My gut told me I was being reasonable for being uncomfortable, but my head told me to just ignore it and it would go away. My gut said tell him to call you by your name and that he was not to make comments about your appearance. But I didn't, because I did not want to appear difficult. I thought about mentioning in to building management, but didn't, because, I thought, maybe he was just being friendly in his own way.</div>
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I responded to his message on the dating website saying that as a rule, I won't date anyone in my building because it is my home and that included him. I naively thought that communication would make it clear that he was not to attempt to fraternize with me. He responded, "damn i'm really sorry I really like you to." </div>
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"I really like you." This is where I lost my grounding and all sense of security. This man does not know me. He does not know what I do for work, or who my friends are, or what my interests are. He sees me come and go and in the gym sometimes. He could not like me. He likes they way I look and he likes whatever image of me he has created in his head. He does not see me and he most definitely does not know me enough to like me. In this moment I lost sense of security in my home. This man can have access to my home. He has been in it in the middle of the night when there were water issues. He has come in for repairs when I am not home. I don't know him and yet he says he really likes me.</div>
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I brought this to my building management, but not without the feelings of guilt and shame. I told them I should have said something earlier. I wonder if I am too feminine when I go to work. Fortunately management has taken this issue seriously and I am waiting to hear if this, based on his work contract, means dismissal or just a write up.</div>
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I am on edge this morning. I have been laying awake since 4:00 wondering if I have ruined someone's livelihood. Wondering if I am in some way I am being ridiculous. I don't want to walk in the halls and I am considering skipping my workout in the instance I would run into him. I feel bad and I am feeling bad that I feel about who I am.</div>
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But I can't help, but think about each time I had a gut feeling about a man in a situation like this, that it always got worse. It never just went away. That they tested boundaries until the pushed me too far. I learned that if you don't draw obvious lines they will see how far they can cross.</div>
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I have had it happen in the past. I have had men who have developed an attachment to me based on a non-existent relationship that is their mind. I once drunkenly let a guy kiss me at a bar. For the next two years I would hear from pretty much strangers details of our relationship that never happened. We never went on one date. I had a college boyfriend, who later had mental issues, send me emails over a decade later saying we had some sort eternal bond. I had a man I went on one date with send me a message months later, and after I declined a second date multiple times, that he sees me in the skyway sometimes. I had never seen him. That's the short list and it's enough to scare you.</div>
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Is it fair that I feel the Universe has scolded me for putting myself back out there online? No. Should I be able to be me and look how want I look without feeling threatened.? Yes. But the reality of it is, is that many years of internet dating, while it has its many positives, has worn on me. The hundreds of sexually harassing and objectifying emails have taken their toll in the I no longer want be on a platform where I can be seen as just number or the assumption that there is not a real person behind the profile.</div>
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I am 38 year old successful, smart, funny, generous, attractive and happy woman. I have wanted to be with the man for a long time who lights me up even brighter. He has not shown up yet. I have faith that he will, but yes, sometimes I get really sick of the wait and kissing frogs. </div>
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I have struggled so much in the last few years asking myself questions. Will I have kids? Should I have kids? Is it weird that I have never been close to marriage? Will I die alone? Who will take care of me? Will I soon be seen as an old maid or a cougar? Is my family disappointed in me because I don't have children? </div>
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I already ask myself these things so I have been irritated with people thinking it is ok to ask me if I ever want to get married or have children. Men I have dated, relatives and co-workers have plainly asked, while often identifying my age, as if I don't know it, if I "ever" want to get married or have kids. It is not their business and the answer is, I don't know. I can tell you that I am sure as hell not doing either unless it is with my equal and my partner. I have not met him, do I don't know. I don't have to know. I don't have to anything just because it appears what people should do. </div>
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I can tell you why I don't know the answer right now. It is because I am happy, now. I am proud of the person I am and I love my life. I am healthy and I have more love in my life than I thought possible. I love my freedom and my ability to travel. I love that I am self sufficient. And it may have taken a long time to tell myself to stop trying to find a tool to change it because it will make me feel better about the society perceives me. I know I don't need a relationship to see myself as I am. I have let go of the idea that a man is going to do things I can't, it has never stopped me before.</div>
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So, Universe, I am listening. I am here and now. I am woman, on her own, here me roar, watch me live in the sun. Bless me. I will stop trying to make things happen in the wrong way and start living the right way, being here, now.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-9286279849282479312016-08-06T07:24:00.000-07:002016-08-06T07:24:24.901-07:00I was feeling part of the scenery, I walked right out of the machineryI have not written in some time. Maybe I have been just too busy. Also, 10 days ago I deleted any access to internet or app dating including my passive use of Tinder. I decided I needed to be present and that I wanted to find a man who could communicate. Those tools were not working. Not sure how I will find him, but I will find him.<br />
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Tonight is my 20 year high school reunion. All I can think is, how did that happen? What have I been doing for 20 years? I have not been married and I do not have children so what else does one do?<br />
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I have three degrees, a business of my own. I have lived in different places, including to other continents. I have traveled all over the world, sometimes alone. I have amassed thousands of amazing moments. And all I can say about high school is that it is one phase that I am glad was short and is over, because it was pretty much the lowest time in my life. And I am glad that was when it was, because it has been all up hill from then on. <br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-24592186187096226762016-03-31T05:46:00.001-07:002016-03-31T05:46:14.870-07:00I was getting ready to threat to be a threat.<i>Your bio is really intriguing and don't get me wrong but you look like one of those princesses in Disney movie.</i><br />
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I added the period in for Joe who is 26 and lives in Michigan.<br />
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I don't think my body looks creepily disproportionate, my skin one unnatural color, and my hair in chunks. <br />
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I had to ask which princess I was like and I was told Belle from Beauty and the Beast. My eyes are blue. I don't think I look like her. I look like me, a real person...and I like it.<br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-29117594383457378452016-03-25T05:29:00.001-07:002016-03-25T05:29:28.658-07:00Happier now that you have become what you hated
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A 26 year old on Lansing, MI writes... <br />
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<i>Your bio is really intriguing and don't get me wrong but you look like one of those princesses in Disney movies. </i></blockquote>
I added the period for him.<br />
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So...I look disproportionate, overly colorful, and my hair flows in chunks. I wonder if this kid uses hallucinogens.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-20557846753068510762016-03-24T05:06:00.000-07:002016-03-24T05:06:59.008-07:00If you want it, you could have it, but you have to have this feeling now...Men like to write..."you seem to be an interesting woman," or "you seem to be intelligent." I don't know what the "seem" part is about and I don't know why it irritates me. I think you can get an idea if a person has some intelligence or not based on what they write. I think you can guess based on content if you think some is interesting or not. If you did not think someone is interesting, why would you pursue them if you did not think they were interesting?...oh yeah, because you want to #$&% them.<br />
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In contrast men write, "you are hot" or "you are cute." If intelligence or level of interest is not face value, why is beauty? I could be posting pictures from high school.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-34271114632403359472016-03-17T06:20:00.000-07:002016-03-17T06:20:24.564-07:00You part the waters, the sames ones I am drowing in...Last night I got a text from a random number. "Hello, remember me?"<br />
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I in fact had no idea who it was and confessed I did not. He gave me his name, but I still had no idea. I asked for a hint. I got back...<br />
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"Horny Guy."<br />
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I informed him it was him that was him and every other guy on the planet. <br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-36191915737903167912016-03-14T05:04:00.000-07:002016-03-14T05:04:33.813-07:00I go hunting for witches...<i>Weekend_In_Vegas</i> just asked me out online. He is a 5'6", Asian, living in Eagan, and looking for a, "nice, Pretty woman to have a relationship." I thought I was getting a free weekend inVegas. I think I will opt out. Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-81000557891573630172016-03-13T12:22:00.000-07:002016-03-13T12:22:07.026-07:00There's layers to the shit player, Tiramasu, TiramasuIf a man writes in his profile that his family, as well as his faith, and the vikings are really important to him, I feel his is misguided in the belief that we have a lot in common.<br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-40555939682612249852016-03-10T05:10:00.001-08:002016-03-10T05:10:27.618-08:00Just going to stand there and watch me burnWell, you may recall Hot Teacher....he reappeared via text. Initially it was a series of updates like he had finally narrowed his bed frame selection down to 3 choices and that he wanted some advice on good foreign films from me. He mentioned that getting into international film and literature was part of his current mindfulness.<br />
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I woke up to these little text bits of information and thought to myself he really needs to work on a greater mindfulness, like what he wants in relationships and how he treats people. Of course, tensions flared, as much as they can via text and he put it back on me, claiming he wanted to see me, but I was the one that had ended it. He crossed the one line I set. I am not letting him go back.<br />
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He then reminded me that we were "not in a relationship." But I am hard on this point, we may not have been in a relationship where each other was defined with something like boyfriend or girlfriend, but when you communicate daily with someone for months...you are involved in a relationship. When you share things about yourself and experiences and communication, it is having a relationship. I have a relationship with the woman that deep cleans my house every 6 weeks.<br />
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And then he text me that he did miss me. To which I wondered how can you miss someone you never had a relationship with?<br />
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Hot Teacher is confused and the confusion transferred to me for some time, and, now dear friends, we are packing Hot Teacher and putting him on a shelf in a box, labeled nice to look at things without value. I probably won't open that box ever to look at those things again.<br />
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Moving on, I have had two dates with a man that I will not reveal the identity of at this moment. There is a really good story there, but I want to save it for the moment. Third date is next week and he is not like any other man I have dated in Minnesota....he is incredibly polite and intelligent. I will see him next week when he gets back into town and that is all I will tell you for now.<br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-14944109590872546352016-03-08T04:25:00.001-08:002016-03-08T04:25:23.325-08:00With my lightening bolts a glowing, I can see where I am going.Kevin from White Bear Lake is back with a bang....five more messages. Here is just a sample.<br />
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<i>If you don't go on a date with me you may never find your true love. You
will never get to experience a life with romance & passion the
kinda stuff women dream of & keep secrets about that only there best
friends know so it can be told as a love story when your old. You will
never understand what it feels to get so turned on just my text alone
w/love song videos that would make you want to rush home for sex. Your
girlfriends would never be jelious of your stories about us or the
little things I do for you. Darling I got a sweet life just looking for
some more to add to it.</i><br />
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I did not write him back. I guess I am missing out of on kinda stuff women dream about. I did ponder the concept of a man sending me text messages of love song videos to turn me on, but really I would just prefer sexts...a lot more efficient.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-41224072942742469992016-02-16T01:03:00.003-08:002016-02-16T01:04:02.955-08:00This is the gift, it comes with a price.Dear readers and friends you have not lost me. I am still here in Bali, now PADI open water certified and nice brown. I went to another little island called Nusa Lembongan for the diving. It was spectacular and cheap. The diving. The island itself is a little sleepy. The highlights include and octopus and a large purple puffer fish as well a French guide that had a head full of dread locks with sea shells worked into the top. He also had a point dread beard. He looked like what you would picture as the top half of a merman when you were a kid. His accent was thick as gravy and his instruction was very thorough. I liked him, but I told I was going to lose it he had me clear my goggles on the dive for practice one more time. The peak was 3 meter manta ray swimming all around me.<br />
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I landed back on the mainland at a hotel sort of central to a lot of beaches so I checked of a few of them out in the two evening I was there. Last night I had an Aussie guy take me out all over two beaches for the night life. At dinner he bought me a head and shoulder and massage on the beach. He actually was there with his teenage kids, but they were on their own for the night and he had cabin fever after being with them for 9 days. We went dancing and to a drag bar and let 16 year old kids take us through the city alleys on motorbikes. The danger of the ride escapes your mind because the breeze is so good. You feel like you are in a video game.<br />
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I had a fun, but overall I was a good girl. The reason was because I had made and arrangement with a man back. To my dismay and oh so predictably this man informed me via text that he had broken our agreement on Valentine's day. Yes, he informed me via text at the end of my vacation after texting me for 5 weeks about seeing me. At first I was very upset, but I am now relieved I am not coming home excited to see him and I won't invest another minute on him.<br />
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I will tell you this though, I live a lovely and wonderful, happy life and I don't need a man, but I know that undoubtedly that I have the capacity and ability to be really good to someone. Someone that can go toe to toe with me. It's my struggle, my burden, my weight to carry this love that I can't seem to give away to a man. It is my affliction and I am wondering if I need to start helping Muslim girls in Bali who get in trouble. Hide them. And then adopt their babies. I could make a my own tribe. Fuck, it would be a lot better use of my time on this planet. And I probably would stay out of therapy.<br />
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Ok, got to get to the pool before dinner. See you soon.<br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-6777061288574845082016-02-08T02:07:00.003-08:002016-02-08T02:07:56.120-08:00Another convesation with no destination <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTqKjhbg5o1jbRKyG84sZ_ge_oV8pD5UIMS6-7r7UwZg9nroolsZAkKQULtBaBxksSWca1SvETbWiHA1jhk34lSXUUr7krJTc75-NJiz5l5hF41fDkMQK6dx2KFEICffiNauOQPCsPI6g/s1600/Screen+Shot+2016-02-08+at+4.07.15+AM.png" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTqKjhbg5o1jbRKyG84sZ_ge_oV8pD5UIMS6-7r7UwZg9nroolsZAkKQULtBaBxksSWca1SvETbWiHA1jhk34lSXUUr7krJTc75-NJiz5l5hF41fDkMQK6dx2KFEICffiNauOQPCsPI6g/s320/Screen+Shot+2016-02-08+at+4.07.15+AM.png" width="320" /></a><br />
I am sure you are wondering where I am. I have lost track myself. I spent 4 days on Gili Air with Molly. There was not much to do there, so we didn't do much. Snorkeling, reading, dance off ping pong games with internationals made from refurbished wood panels that failed as dance floor at an outdor bar. <br />
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We to a fast boat...which requires a lot of waiting around to Padang Bai where we were herded on to transfers (vans) to our destinations. Molly and my final destination was Ubud where we spent the last 2 days touring temples and shopping before she went to the airport.<br />
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Tomorrow, my driver will be pick me up and take me to some holy springs to swim in and some other temples and then he will drop be in Sanur, another beach town for one night, before I take a fast boat to another island were I will do my Open Water PADI. Tomorrow I have dinner plans with a hot Aussie.<br />
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There is too much to tell so I am going bullet point the highlights-<br />
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<li>A monkey tried to run off with my skirt in the Ubud monkey forest.</li>
<li>Shopping is off the cuff. I think I bought about 12 things for $20 yesterday. </li>
<li>I totally got a bacteria. Was not feeling all that great. Had the driver take me to the pharmacy where you can get tetracycling for about 70 cents. Much better now.</li>
<li>My reef cuts are starting to close thanks to a Chinese medicine that costs about $2 and looks like iodine, but nobody knows what is exactly in it. </li>
<li>I have a sea urchin needle or some reef in my foot, but it stopped bothering me a few days so I am not worried.</li>
<li>You can get your laundry washed an neatly folded for super cheap here.</li>
<li>There is awesome cheap food everywhere. </li>
<li>Today I paid $13 for an hour massage, a creamy scrub down with a cucumber wash, and a bath full of flower petals followed by a hair washing, treatment, and blow dry. WTF</li>
<li>Tomorrow I have dinner plans with a hot Aussie.</li>
<li>It is Chinese New Year so there are a lot people shorter than me walking around on narrow sidewalks with umbrellas. Dangerous. </li>
<li>There are a lot of tattoos and tattoo shops here...just seams like a bad idea to me with the sun and sea and all. Also, everybody looks the same...stupid.</li>
<li>It is really fucking hot sometimes. When the lady put the cucumber wash on me I lost control of my giggles because cold was so foreign it shocked my system.</li>
<li>When I got that last massage they have me these weird underwear that is made out of the same stuff they make the hair caps out of in the the hospital. Or course I ripped them putting them on. I could not tell them the front from the back and they only covered one cheek</li>
<li>Snorkeling on Gili Air was magical, however the Germans and their go pros need to fucking go back to Germany.</li>
<li>You can barter anything here.</li>
<li>Lot of Asiaphiles here.</li>
<li>I am eating a lot of fruit.</li>
<li>It is clear that the Balinese don't use toilet paper because I can never comfortably reach the toilet paper roll from the toilet.</li>
<li>I am having breakfast on my deck each day.</li>
<li>I have had a lot of seafood. Grilled calamari is the best.</li>
<li>I kind of want to drive a moped here, but I am a little freaked.</li>
<li>OK, I am actually going to do some work now, from my deck overlooking a rice field.<br /><br /></li>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-71502951610907164902016-01-29T00:52:00.001-08:002016-02-02T21:58:52.185-08:00Why don't we drive through the night, we will wake up in Mexico<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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That's me surfing in Bali. That's something I never thought I would do, but I am quite enjoying it. Yes, I am wearing pants. That is because the day before I went surfing in just my swimsuit bottom and my butt cheeks are sufficiently pink. My tan is a bit spotty at the moment, but will be one tone by the time I leave. Basically the days here consist of surfing up to 4 hours. Eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner with people from the camp which are mainly laid back international men. We have a mixture of Turks, Aussie's, a German, an Italian, and a Scottish guy. The food is simple and wonderful and there is an abundance of tropical fruit that we eat and drink for cheap. It is very hot and we have a rain almost every day which comes as a relived break from the hot day. In the sun the water is the color green auqa which compliments the brown of our teachers skin, funny young pro surfers that work to make sure you are loving the surfing. They listen to non stop techno in the car and know all the English lyrics. After dinner and a Bintang, local beer, or two we sleep very hard and then do it all over again. <br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-84141983512760435272016-02-02T21:58:00.001-08:002016-02-02T21:58:35.755-08:00I'm headed downtown, cruising through the alley Tip-toeing in the street like Dally <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggzyan8fnZ4Sex-1_6SeSXvtCvehiQbXbjR8Z4KBIUmYIvRmMiItJNbZ7xSyJDQtvpvEOkSropz6lCxijPOEdgVkdEU-Cj5TIDVwrxPvShMnZpsqDRJiEdJC8cuQoFq3RNjAWB8yk-Pfs/s1600/Screen+Shot+2016-02-02+at+11.56.05+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggzyan8fnZ4Sex-1_6SeSXvtCvehiQbXbjR8Z4KBIUmYIvRmMiItJNbZ7xSyJDQtvpvEOkSropz6lCxijPOEdgVkdEU-Cj5TIDVwrxPvShMnZpsqDRJiEdJC8cuQoFq3RNjAWB8yk-Pfs/s1600/Screen+Shot+2016-02-02+at+11.56.05+PM.png" /></a></div>
I have lost track of where I am and what day it is. Molly and I are on a very small Island off Lombok which is called Gili Air. It is a small island and it being off season, it is quiet. There are small white beaches that are good for snorkeling. Yesterday we took snorkel trip that dropped us off at 4 spots between islands and we had lunch at another island. Things are comfortable, but underdeveloped here. I think that will change very soon.<br />
<br />
Today we biked the island and read. It is rainy this afternoon so we are laying on our private deck at our hotel. The days are composed of sun, seafood, and water. Tomorrow we will move on to Ubud where Molly will leave me in a few days and then I have 12 days on my own left in Bali.<br />
<br />
Sometime ask me about the man who asked me to hold his Chicken on Gili Air over a beer. <br />
<br />
I am there in the hammock. More to come. Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-16152275171658759702016-01-26T21:16:00.001-08:002016-01-26T21:20:05.897-08:00Another conversation with no destination<style>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwxp3NHzt0ybgrGDCFFRTUryaNJC1znd2hw-JP_cNfzeou1ntxbiaq56oozejYec6q9zgG7yjUvOeFGNiO4p5EyGmr-c0jrDROstigTblrDPXjrfpmac_gChNWmXouASGBryPawLT71Ls/s1600/FullSizeRender.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwxp3NHzt0ybgrGDCFFRTUryaNJC1znd2hw-JP_cNfzeou1ntxbiaq56oozejYec6q9zgG7yjUvOeFGNiO4p5EyGmr-c0jrDROstigTblrDPXjrfpmac_gChNWmXouASGBryPawLT71Ls/s320/FullSizeRender.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I have lost track of how many days I have been here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have moved from Kuta, the land of older
Australians who like to drink, to Padang Padang, the land of surf.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Before I headed south, I made the most of the
Super Likes I was getting on Tinder.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>According to a Brazilian who has relocated to South Carolina, I am hot
and I am going to take it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I decided I
am going to take full advantage of the international tinder buffet while I am
here and get some free meals and drinks and even flattery.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Somehow, leaving Minnesota, I have moved up
on the food chain when it comes to dating.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I am beginning to think it is Minnesota men, and not me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had three dates and not one of these guys
was anything, but a gentlemen, and I have had some fun too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When Molly leaves I will go back to using
this app.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Speaking of Molly, she arrived the night before last.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I came to surf camp the day before her and
surfed one day before.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I surfed two days
and my body is shot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is a lot of
paddling here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My feet have scrapes from
the reef.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My knees and ribs are
bruised.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have a rash on my arms and
thighs from the board and I can’t lift my arms over my head at the moment, but
it is all worth it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The camp is chill with and international mix of 20’s –
40’s.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The food is good and clean and
when you surf you can’t get enough if it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The surf days are 4 hours.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Two 2
hour sessions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I stayed back to work and rest today and unfortunately the
area’s electricity went down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
meandered local businesses where you could not buy anything because of the
electricity, but stayed open with full staff there just to let you know you
could not buy anything.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The coast line here is in the south.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The scenery is good, which includes the backs
of international surfers and a turquoise ocean.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>More to come.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-87776735228339468542016-01-24T00:03:00.001-08:002016-01-24T00:03:26.827-08:00I'm sittin' in the railway station Got a ticket for my destination
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Day two in Bali felt like 4
days in one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I managed a 5:00 AM Skype
call with a client.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn't really go
to sleep after that because I had gone to bed at 8:30 that night before due to
heat and jet leg so I decided to go in search of a coffee shop. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And what really woke me up was when my toilter
would not stop running.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I noticed a turn
handle on the side of the toilet and under the seat cover a diagram.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t actually read the diagram.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just saw the word stop and an illustration to
turn the handle away from you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
result was a contraption that brought out a hose that worked as a bidet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes, I shot myself right in the middle with a
bidet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That resulted in a shower and the
washing of my nightshirt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, at that
moment I was plenty awake.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I did my reading and chose to walk to Bemo coffee.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wanted to verify the location on the hotel map
and not carry my entire book so asked the girl at the front desk to help verify
the streets.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She asked if I wanted a
taxi and warned me it was a long walk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
estimated 15 – 20 minutes and she confirmed that timeline.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Proximity and effort seem to be perceived
differently.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Or they just think white
people are lazy.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">It was about a 20 minute walk
and a good time to go because the city was not totally away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At Bemo, I did have an excellent iced coffee
and the young man asked my name when taking my order.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The whole staff proceeded to the call me miss
Gina.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After I got back to the hotel, I changed
and went to the beach and barter with a young man from Sumatra for a beach
chair.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His name was Jack and he came to
Bali to live to surf.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He reminded me of <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>my friend Jaun Carlos from Cost Rida.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
stayed two hours, reading and swiiming, while various vendors chatted me
up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They all tell you're their English
name and to come back and look for them.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I then walked up the beach
and decided to make my way back to my hotel via a different route.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was stopped by a very time woman covered in
layers of color and very round sunglasses.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She asked told me I was beautiful me to be in a picture with her
children.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was in my bikini so I
declined to show anything, but my face.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>However she told me that I was beautiful and that if she came back for
another life she would want the color of my eye.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her name was Daisy and she was from Sumatra
and when I told her she was beautiful she told met that I made her day.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I then wandered on until I
took refuge from afternoon downpour at restaurant with the best $2 smoothie I
ever had.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Next I found a little spa
place by my hotel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It could have been
dodgy, but for the equivalent of $8.50 I went for an hour massage and a full
body scrub.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had a 21 year old who had
been married for 4 years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was in a
small portioned room with a curtain at one end and flowered wall paper.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because the room was small she had to push
the table with me on to maneuver around me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I asked her if I was heavy she immediately said, “yes.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While I my stomach she took turns squatting
my back and sitting on my ass.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
weighed nothing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What was more apparent
was the bottle of oil wedged between my thighs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Her force did not match her size, but I am pretty sure I could have
broken here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I came out relaxed and soft
as a baby’s bottom.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I meandered the rest of the
day until I met up with a man named Bob from England.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bob, right?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Bob is such and American name.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But it was Bob and he talked more than I do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We had beers in Seminyak which is more of an
upscale shops and restaurants.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We
decided to venture back to Kuta where I was staying because I had seen a Korean
BBQ there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, I hiked up my skirt and
got back of Bob’s motorbike.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While I
have not been inclined to rent one myself because I would like to keep the skin
on my knees, I enjoyed the breeze.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bob
liked to go fast and hit bumps so I would hold on tighter.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">It took me some time to find
the restaurant because I first stumbled upon it after a jet leg nap.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The owner, Min Hee, was very excited and made
me speak any Korean I could.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The did not
have Jim Dak I wanted nor the Dak Galbi.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This was because, as the waiter informed us a half hour after we ordered,
the had no chicken.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dak is the Korean
word for chicken.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The waiter promised
there would be chicken the next day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His
name was Karma.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">The night with Bob went on
until 4:00 AM.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mostly pool and beers and
meandering alleys.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All good fun and Bob
was a perfect gentleman.</span></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-81480305072980680082016-01-21T03:34:00.001-08:002016-01-21T03:34:32.732-08:00This is my tune for the taking.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Greetings from Bali. This blog is taking a detour from dating to
traveling since I will be in Bali for 28 days and probably won't be
dating. I might be eyeing some surfers. I'll keep you posted. From
Los Angeles, it took me 27 hours and 3 planes to get here. The first
leg to Japan being a little over 11 1/2 hours. The second to Singapore
taking about 7 1/2 hours. <br />
<br />
Taking 3 nighttime Advil
combined with the fact that on the 2 first legs of the journey I had an
entire row to myself I slept very well. If you ever have the chance to
fly Singapore airlines I strongly recommend it, beyond the staff just
being nice, upon boarding they not only give you your hot towel, but
also a little take home care package which has socks, a toothbrush, and
one serve toothpaste. Like many international flights you have your
own entertainment screen, but with a plethora of movies etc. On top of
it, the bar cart is exceptional. I fancied a Bailey's on the rocks and I
got it. This was long before I took the Advil. I want to hang on to
my liver. My only complaint is that they may feed you too much and I
suffered from not actually being hungry when the food arrived wanting
only to sleep. However, with my first meal came Hagen Daaz ice cream
for dessert. You can bet I ate it.<br />
<br />
My landing in Japan was uneventful. Per
usual, I was ushered again through security and then I found a counter
with Udon. On we went to Singapore. I was first taken by the massive
bathroom stalls and spread out sinks, but there was also a lounge area with vanities to freshen up at and dressing rooms. One step above the music playing toilet seats of Japan.<br />
<br />
Before I went on to my gate, which would not be open as it was 3:30 in the morning I went to once again think about food and headed towards the food court where I feared only Dunkin Donuts would be open. On the way I eyed a girl getting a leg massage in a machine. I recognized her from my flight so I asked if it was free and in fact it was. And she turned out to be a girl named Cynthia from South Minneapolis on her way to teach in Vietnam. She was uneasy, but I assured her that she would have the time of her life like I did in South Korea.<br />
<br />
Once in Bali I showered and made my way for a long walk on the beach and had a virgin pina coloda. The heat was intense so the virgin drink was about all I could handle. I then took a dip in my hotel pool and talked to some french girls briefly. At about 2:30 I finally had my appetite and so I meandered up the alley thinking if the heat held back my appetite like this everyday, I'll go home a rail. Hungry by this hour, I made my way back to a little place that had locals and foreigners earlier in the day.<br />
<br />
There was about 8 wait staff, myself, and one other guy, yet
service was incredibly slow. I settled on a papaya juice and a dish
special to Bali with Tuna and Prawns baked in a red sauce inside corn
husks. It was good and with service charge and rice, the whole meal was
about $5. <br />
<br />
I sat at a table that faced out to the alley with a backdrop of sheet metal fencing with graffiti. Beyond that wall was the back of some hotels. When I was done eating and had time to reflect I thought the moment romantic, when the heavy sky birthed a hard rain and tourists and scooters darted in front of me. Everyone smiling despite being soaked. But then I looked at my book<i> The Heart is a Lonely Hunter</i>, as the staff chose to play the typical Asian pop artist who sings overly dramatic ballads they all know the words to, but do not understand, and I thought to myself that I am no less of a cliche of a single woman pushing middle age who has cats and has read 50 shades of grey. Maybe from outward appearances it seems cooler or sexier, but I am still find myself longing for a companion, especially when being called to by the local men. And every time I try to talk to people, I can help but think they must think I am weird to be here alone. I am definitely no fucking Julia Roberts. I am a stranger in a strange land.<br />
<br />
And I think to myself, what have I done? What I am going to for 4 days before Molly gets here and what will I do when she leaves. But I will talk to many people, I will find things to do and ,I will eventually make friends along the way and have some stories to tell. And I will be grateful I came here on my own. And now I am momentarily grateful that I figured out how to use the air conditioning in my room, and I was not having heat stroke. And that I just figured out how to open a beer bottle on my balcony rail without an opener.<br />
<br />
Tonight I might get crazy and take myself to a Korean restaurant to have a dish that I can't even find in NYC. Or might make a pot of noodles in my room.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-29938380901334372902016-01-15T05:44:00.004-08:002016-01-15T05:44:47.195-08:00Leave you here waving your wounds. Waving your guns for somebody new.A letter to my X boyfriend that I can't send.<br />
<br />
Dear former friend and lover,<br />
<br />
I am packing my bags for Bali for a month where I will go to surf camp etc. This time, with sundresses strewn about the floor, I won't be trying on my swimsuits for you and spending time as much time as I can making love to you before I go, just to keep the taste of your skin on my tongue or the smell of your hair on my mind. <br />
<br />
Last time I went I had just fallen for you and so when I left for a month, I wrote you a card for each of the days I was gone. Some were funny, some very flirty, some to just tell you what I liked about you. I did it when I went to Portugal too, and you always kept those notes tied up in ribbon in your night stand. The notes seemed closer to you then I ever did.<br />
<br />
While away, we texted when the 12 hour time difference didn't interfere and I sent you pictures of my tan progress. I secretly longed for you in still moments and my body craved you. The men on my adventures and at camp did not catch my eye, because you were on my mind. I missed your laugh and how your fingers would drag on my hairline. When I woke up I missed how when you woke up with me, you would scoop me up right back into your arms and drift back to sleep for as long as you could.<br />
<br />
You had it made, really. A younger, hot, girlfriend who made six figures while loving her work. A confident girl who was content to see you once or twice a week so you could tend to your kids and job. A woman who went off to surf camp and had her adventures, but looked forward to coming home to you. A woman who doted on you when you had your time together. But for some reason, you couldn't handle it, in this so difficult life you think you have. Your life, which is no more difficult than anyone around you, in fact, it is quite predictable. Predictably boxed up and safe. <br />
<br />
And rather than inviting this power house of a woman in to help you to not only hold up the sky, but to raise it up, you thought it would be better to be alone. You thought it better to accept bleak middle class, mid-life life as a road to the end rather than take a risk, that this girl could really love you and just maybe make your life better. In all reality, life with me would have been filled with adventures and laughs and all the best bits.<br />
<br />
But you went your own way and you did by just stopping talking to me. And so now, I don't like you at all and I don't look at any of our concerts or trip to Isla where I learned to scuba dive with fondness. Now, I have just added you to the list of assholes. <br />
<br />
And so I bless your path of mid-life aloneness in a bleak suburb. And when you finally get your mojo back and you start dating that paycheck to paycheck divorced lady from down the road with a muffin top whose kids you don't like ,don't think of me and how I reached to get all the juice out of life and how that was too much for you. And when you ask her for eye contact during sex and you realize the blank stare is just acceptance of being content to have someone stick it in her, don't think of me. Don't think of my tan, surf body that came home to you and enfolded you. Don't think of the notes I wrote you, or the sweet things I said to you about you. They will only make you sad. They are not real. You made them not real. You erased it.<br />
<br />
Best from Bali.<br />
<br />
Me Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-33134244090544604722016-01-15T05:21:00.001-08:002016-01-15T05:21:57.097-08:00Lonesome tears, I can't cry them anymore. Countdown to me going to Bali for a month. Yes, a month. What will I do there? Surf camp. Read books. Watch sunsets. Forget time. I won't be internet dating, that is for sure. In fact, besides my Tindering in Londn, I have not had time or interest.<br />
<br />
I did have a second Tinder date in London. He is from Athens, but educated and living in London for 18 years. We went for a walk through Camden market and then a nice Japanese dinner. He came out twice more. Once to meet my friend and myself at Gordon's wine bar on the Enbankment, though he doesn't drink. If you have get to London, you must go to Gordon's and get a port and some Camembert. Chris, the polite Englishman, also came out my last night for dinner and never made any suggestions about going to his flat and he wasn't short. We still text and while he is not my man with a yacht I think we will be in touch and see each other again some time.<br />
<br />
At home I have been spending recreational time with man I refer to as Hot Teacher. Per the usual, he currently believes he has some barriers that stop him leading into a deeper relationship. Though I don't know how men think that just because you don't give someone a title like girlfriend or that they are dating them, there is still a relationship. When you ask for decorating advice or share a toothbrush or text about music, there is a relationship forming or developing there. We avoid the word because we have internal beliefs that it comes with heavy implications. That, relationships, most times, end badly. But most times, we make them end badly or believe they have to end badly.<br />
<br />
Really we are all just running around trying to have all these relationships just to see ourselves. We are all trying to figure out who we are and where we are going and we need to see ourselves in others to do it. What do I see in Hot Teacher about myself? Well besides a veracious appetite, I see the me that has worked very hard to make the life she has and doesn't want to let someone that could shake its foundation. I see the me that avoids commitment to just focus on fun. The me that needs to always remain partially free.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-62937706618404081982015-12-28T02:33:00.000-08:002015-12-28T02:33:58.927-08:00And the words came just like a hard rainI am traveling in England and have been staying with a friend in London who runs a pub. This makes her availability very limited while I am here, so she insisted that I go on Tinder. Which after I did some swiping she edited out most of the matches and did some swiping of her own. Finally, after screening, she agreed that I should meet a man who that asked me for a drink on Christmas Eve. <br />
<br />
I was a bit reluctant because I did not like his flippant and somewhat negative attitude. But of course, when I acted dismissive of him, he got in cab and came to my friend's pub to meet me. He text me he was at the bar in a black puffer, which thank god I lived in England before, or I wouldn't know what he has referring to. There were in fact about 6 guys in black puffy jackets at the bar, but of course he was the shortest one. Quite short. We had a few drinks and I soon learned he was in fact a somewhat famous music producer.<br />
<br />
The truth was, and he probably knew it, that I was not really interested in him, just his experiences. He worked on some albums I liked quite a bit. Eventually he left that bar, but not after asking to see me again, and with an invitation to his million pound two bedroom flat. <br />
<br />
He sent some texts over the next few days inviting me over, dropping hints, testing my boundaries. I stop responding so he asked me to, "dinner, etc." I told him I would have dinner, but that I wasn't into etc. unless it was explained. He told me, "never mind then." I told him that he needed to be looking for a much lower caliber of woman if he wanted cheap and easy. So no free dinner from famous music producer in England. But it doesn't matter what you do, when your personality sucks.<br />
<br />
However, next week, a man who spends half the year in the Mediterranean. I don't know yet if it is on a boat, but thank you universe, we may be getting closer.<br />
<br />
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-54673992357711129662015-12-18T22:51:00.001-08:002015-12-18T22:51:07.977-08:00The greatest lost track of all time.Pretty sure it is 2015 and I was making out in a car in the drop of zone of my building once again in plain view of my socially awkward building security guard. I am pretty sure he has seen me kissing at least a dozen different men. <br />
<br />
I got out of the car eventually...the one I was sucking face in...and entered the front door simultaneously with my neighbor, who last year awkwardly asked me out online though he already had my phone number. I was to be ignored by my security guard as he said goodnight to my neighbor. Usually he likes to use my name any chance he gets. <br />
<br />
So, I was making out with a man in the drop off zone of my building. So I am 37 and have never felt compelled to get married and so I travel to many places and make out with many men. I am pretty sure it is 2015.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-52665866082232079672015-12-18T04:53:00.002-08:002015-12-18T04:56:20.560-08:00It was all colors and heat, and raining in the streets, and bad bad love.<h3 class="ui-hdr ng-binding" data-ng-click="beginEdit()">
<span class="ui-edit-link"><span class="icon icon-edit"><span style="font-weight: normal;">My Profile:</span></span></span></h3>
Disclaimer: You have to read this with a voice of sarcasm and be aware the person behind it is happy. She also believes that there are good men out there, but the story reflects what happens when we force opposite experiences and the unknowing of others up against each other.
Not too long ago a man I had a phone call with pre-coffee (gag) date which was subsequently cancelled. The statement that made that the determination there would be no coffee was, "there has to be something wrong with you if you have not been married by 37." Since that day, and since being stood up by a different man I also met on this site, on was to be a second date with a man who pursued me, and asked me for the second date, I have been asking myself that question. What is wrong me? No meds. Check. Not traumatized by a divorce. Check. Happy and emotionally healthy. Check. Active - current half marathon pace was 8:56. Check. No cats. Check. No body image issues. Check. No addictions. Check. Successful business with work that makes me happy. Check. Full bank account. Check. Not bad looking. Check. No weird sexual hang ups. Check. Sense of humor. Check. When I say I like to travel, I can back it up with 21 countries. I value people and experiences and not material possessions. I like my life a lot and I want to share the fun I have with a man. I am also primed for partnership in my life and looking for my family.
Sipping my coffee this morning, watching CBS Sunday with Sylvester Stallone as the one of the guests, it has come clear what is wrong with me. I'm potentially delusional. I want real love in my life from a man. I am stand up gal looking for her stand up a guy. I am looking for my man to man up to a strong woman. I am looking for a relationship where we inflate, each other, not deflate. I have not settled and won't. And that is what is wrong with me.
However, I am now realizing this website is little use to me because I am traveling 8 out of the next 12 weeks for work and vacation including a month in Bali so I have no time to vet this site for that stand up guy. Waiting for this subscription to expire, maybe someone can inspire me with some content and maybe we can have a drink between trips. Note, dead animals, gym shots, and bathroom mirrors don't do it for me. <br />
<br />
A Message:<br />
<br />
<i>Hey, how's it going?
Read your checklist, everything checks out. (I read it kind of quickly
at first and thought you said "no weird sex" and was like there's the
problem, then I read it again..No weird SEXUAL HANGUPS....that makes
more sense!!)
You also said dead animals, gym pics and bathroom mirror selfies don't
do it for you.....not to pick in your pictures, but your campfire feet??
What kind of men do you think that will that attract? I will tell
you, guys with foot fetishes, thats who......otherwise known as "Guys
with weird sexual hangups."
Have fun in Bali, if you are bored and can find internet, would love to
hear about your trip since I have never been past Mexico and Canada.
Dan</i><br />
<br />
Clearly the word sexual is burned in this man's brain.<i> </i>Once again, I am a loss for words.<br />
<br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-34234543539353748472015-11-11T05:06:00.003-08:002015-12-16T19:28:00.638-08:00So high I don't want to come down to face the loss of the thing that I lostThese are the messages I woke up to. I am still taking them in over coffee, but I can decipher if any of these men are actually interested in me. <br />
<br />
Would you go on a date with -<br />
<br />
Man A.<br />
<i>Let me be direct...only fair..<br /><br />Pic 5 is same pose as 1...one might
conclude you hate getting your pic taken. If there were a
caption...might say..."for fuck sake...again". Pardon the language.
Where were we...<br /><br />Lost track of my own thought for a second. Vehement...about what?<br /><br />World traveler...where? And most importantly...your income might suggest FANCY HOTEL...BUT, I'm thinking road less traveled.</i><br />
<br />
Man B.<br />
<i>Hello there,<br /><br />My name is Gelmar, I am actually a Lebanese, born in
Minnesota yet raised in my native Lebanon. I moved back in the summer
of 2013 after working an traveling in many parts of the world in my
career in aquaculture. I bought my own business in order to settle down.
I am the eldest of three brothers, my folks are still living in
Lebanon. I have two adorable nieces (one is just 2 months old and I see
her every Sunday)<br /><br />My circle of friends is very limited so like
many of us here, I joined match, put a profile up and started messaging
and making the first approach. No response. I tried many times,
different styles, consulted google on the perfect first message, again
nothing. Dumb tips like: Talk about something on her profile, be funny,
be sweet, be short, be witty, no naked pics, smile in your pics, post
pics with friends, post pics with no friends, grammar is everything, no
emoticons, use emoticons and on and on...<br /><br />The result...nothing...<br /><br />For
a guy it makes no sense at all to even be on a dating site, for a girl
she sorts through a ton on emails and maybe or maybe not she will
respond...and if she does respond, do you ask her out on the second or
the third email???<br /><br />Believe me, not easy<br /><br />I apologize to YOU
for my rant. I really think you are pretty and liked what you wrote
about yourself and some of your interests reflects mine and I would
certainly be interested in meeting you in the real world. But after five
minutes of just sitting there thinking of the perfect thing to write to
you, I just decided just type in what is really going through my
mind...<br /><br />So there, <br /><br />Gelmar</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
Man C. <br />
<i>Let's start with music...who is latest favorite? I'm addicted to The
Weend...the guy is fantastic and sings like MJ but much darker and
profane. The track Angel makes me cry on occasion but really the whole
album puts me in a frame of mind I love. ( I'll be honest, it's erotic)
Nowlet's move on to your attitude...you don't F around do you? :) I
tease mercilessly but not to hurt....but I'm guessing you can take
it....ok pictures, let's see....oh, did you know you have huge beautiful
eyes? No, for realsy, and they're blue! �� You don't strike me as
someone that is impressed with compliments but you outta know, you're a
doll :-) and yes, I am aware I have the best screen name ever so no need
to praise...do 3 things for me? First, make me laugh, Second, tell me
the one thing you want more than anything else. and third...if you were
stuck on an island for the rest of your life what three bands/musicians
dead or alive would you bring along? Now we'll see just what a music
snob you are! ������ I'm Clint</i><br />
<br />
ANSWER: NONE OF THE ABOVE<i> </i> Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-69726676122721114562015-12-16T19:27:00.000-08:002015-12-16T19:27:24.838-08:00She got a brohter into blues, but he don't know the blues at all.A man had emailed me stating he felt so strongly about meeting me in person. He said he thought it was "chemistry" and that<i> </i>I could be the one he has been waiting for. I told that chemistry has multiple layers that cannot be determined by looking at the screen. I said that I thought he just like my pictures. Below is how he responded.<br />
<br />
<i>Ok let's not call it chemistry. Men are attracted physically by looks
where women are more complicated by needing kind loving words, touching
like holding hands or just a hand caressing her as you walk by, most
importantly having a trusting bond knowing they won't leave you or stray
which is the foundation of it all. I challenge you to meet me. I am
sure I will win you over. U just need to see me in person. I wonder all
those things you do about why haven't I met her. Doors open in life
please don't shut that door out just yet. What if I'm that guy that you
overlooked like so many. Found things wrong before you gave him a
chance. I could be that one that makes you so damm happy in life.</i><br />
<br />
The hand caressing her as you walk by is not only grammatically confusing, but makes me feel creepy and so of course I did not respond. Chemistry is wonderful and addictive thing. Recently, I felt it, feel it with someone, our properties mixed, sparks flew, and then reality set in and we are not trying to decide if there is any practicality, but it is hard to see when you are punch drunk on pheromones. <i> </i>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752212666811642572.post-63308996634810905762015-12-16T04:52:00.001-08:002015-12-16T04:52:17.923-08:00The bow, the hit, the woo.New dating rule of mine. To less effort I put into get ready the better looking and the nicer the man is. I went out last night for chips and guac, and while in the morning I fully intended to go to yoga before my date, work ran late. I didn't actually go to yoga, but I seized the opportunity to look as though I had been so. I have another date Friday night.<br />
<br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0